i talked about the party a little bit on Fitocracy, and extensively in therapy this afternoon, but i'll write a bit here while it's relatively fresh in my mind. it was pretty crazy; girls were getting naked everywhere, people having sex in the middle of the floor, i got to feel a pretty hot girl's tits on the floor (which didn't escalate because i have no idea how to do that) and a reaaaaally hot girl's arse in a pub before the party even started. it got gatecrashed by some horrible people from Angel who really killed the atmosphere by harassing the girls and being generally unpleasant. it kicked off a couple of times. some guy stomped someone in the face for talking shit about him, apparently.

the best thing about the party was seeing my friend, who i lost touch with for a good couple of years during my depressed recluse period. this guy is maybe the most interesting person i know, both in terms of life experience and the conversations i can have with him, and he makes me feel comfortable all the time and looks out for me. he spent most of his night at the party introducing me to everyone and getting girls to feel my stomach, because that's what he does. his new girlfriend, who i had never met before, is amazing. the kind of girl i hope i can marry someday. i guess my friend talked me up to her a lot because she was immediately so familiar and affectionate (even before the MDMA!). it's weird; in this situation, ordinarily i would fall in love with the girl and hate myself, but maybe because i love being with them both so much and they're obviously so happy together, i'm actually happy for them.

but the best part of the weekend was still her cuddling on my lap back at their flat (non-sexual). oh, i carried her part of the way home on my back too, which made me feel pretty manly.

adjusting to regular life after a weekend like that is very hard for me, because it's still such a new experience. i definitely need a job; i'm bored and restless all the time now, and i can't keep still.